Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Pretty New Pony

Ki was more than pleased when Pa traded in her tiny two-wheeled filly for a bigger pony...this one a nice dappled blue n pink. Pa adjusted the saddle to the right height n Ki hopped on up n spurred her new Nellie down the sidewalk. Giddyap!

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Pa's Girlfriends

Pa got asked out on a date by one of his girlfriends. How could he say no? He gots to hold a pretty girl on his arm whilst checking out hogs n horses at the county fair. Sparky dun made him feel like a youngin all over again. But the outin was only beginnin...

With the sun settin low, the stage lights came up on a toe-tappin band...Little Big Town. Pa succumbed to Sparky's temptins to scurry down to the front o the stage where it was reported that Pa jigged a little to the music...even loaded his girlfriend on his shoulders so she could see the band above the crowd. Pa crooned along with the song about bein born n raised in the boondocks...
You get a line, I'll get a pole
We'll go fishin in a crawfish hole
Five card poker on a Saturday night
Church on Sunday mornin...

Wanderin round later that night, Pa ran into his other girlfriend Cubby. She wasn't at all jealous, but only required a little huggin. Pa had plenty o that for both his blonde beauties.

So how does a date like this end? You strap yourself into a cage n hang on for dear life on the Kamikaze! It is kind of like a dysfunctional ferris wheel...swingin upside down at breakneck speeds!

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Vacashun...Week Deuce

On week deuce of our fam'ly vacashun we dun left River City n headed to the woods o Ioway. We settled into a cabin with the coons n coyotes prowlin abouts, but not so different than our cabin in Neebraska. We took to relaxin n nappin n such...but the littlins tugged ol' Ma n Pa to enjoyin the wetter parts o the woods. We splashed amongst the fishes n scared a frog or two. Just take a look at what the brownie captured...

Cold water requires a quick in before you feel the shivers...

King o the raft...we thinks Kiki wrestled everyone off...
pushin Pa into the depths first.

Katie...don't let go! There be crocs in the water!

Heavy weights Pa n Uncle Jeff send Joe a flyin off the BLOB!


When we's got tuckered in nature's pond, we all headed to the cement pond. Slip n slide. You got just as wet...but in a wilder sort o way. Down the chute n thru the tunnel. There be a lot more to this than the pictures we be showin. We had so much fun that we forgot all about snappin pics with the brownie. What follers be just a samplin o what we did...

Ma n Ki creatin waves.

Cassie splashes out o the tunnel.

Joe...can't you steer this thing?


Back in the woods we dun dried out jus fine. Kiki then ventured out n discovered critters in needin of some luvin.

Tradin clover for horse slobber.

Hey Ma! It's Wilbur!

Finishin with the critters, Ki plays a newfangled
version o pool called carpet ball.


Course, vacashun be all about fam'ly. So we dun gathered together n tried gettin along. We congregated with cussins n gramps n grams n a assortment o drifters n a few blacksheep. Not sayin who the blacksheeps was, but someone dun pointed at Pa!

Table games...Pa cheated provin he was indeed
a blacksheep...if not just a little gray!

Weenie roastin with the cussins.

Bubba ate too many beans with his weenies, promptin an evacuation of the kinfolk that be sittin round him.


All in all, a pretty good week deuce...and it left us all plumb tired! But it was a joyful tired. You can bets we be tryin it all again next year!

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Round Ball n Cracker Jack

We decided to pay a visit to the boys of summer whilst in the Big O. They plays in a pretty big house n the front door be guarded by a rather large critter, but he was all smiles when he saws us n let us right in. The game was a hoot…lots o base runnin n slidin in the dirt. The littlins got their fill o cotton candy n coca cola n we all sang “Take Me Out To The Ball Game.” We also sang n danced the letters Y, M, C n A. Not sure what that spells, but we thinks the cheerleaders needs a little more studyin on the subject of ritin. The home team won in the end, but that was jus the beginning…

No sooner was the winners dun congratulatin each others when suddenly the lights was put out n music blared n oh my gracious golly…the sky lits up with colored splosions. Guess they heard li’l Ki had celebrated her bday most recently n bein she was in town, they wanted to show their affections too. Right considerate o them!

The night was still young n there was more celebratin to be had, so we n our 8,000 new ballpark friends headed out to the parkin lot where long lost cussin Tracy Lawrence was awaitin our arrivin. He brought all his boys n they played n played n played some more…pure country! Pa pulled out his mouth organ n Ma produced her Jew’s harp n dun added to the harmonies whilst Ki n Bubba set to square dancin. Just a li’l more country culture showed to the big city folk.

All in all…not a bad day in River City!

Pa's Putterins

Times...they be a changin. Used to be a game was shootin at targets or log rollin or outrunnin the doxies befores theys catched ya n dragged you to the altar. Pa was real good at that one til he ran outta breath one day n gots caught by Ma. Anyhoo, the gamin of a new generation be knockin round a little ball with a club called a putter. The aim be rollin that bitty pellet into what appears to be a gopher hole....pullin it back out n doin it all over again fer a total of 18 putterins. The chilluns challenged us ol timers to a game. It all be fine n good until a gorilla sat on Bubba's ball. Took a while, but we stared down the purple primate n he finally gave it back. We think he n the tiger followed us from the zoo. Ki beat us all by scorin well over a hundred points! Pa came in last place with a pitiful 47. O for the good ol days of chasin country boys n avertin the lassies!

Critter Country

We jus got dun travelin the world, n we barely covered more than a couple miles! We saws the African plain, South American rain forest, Sahara desert n Arctic circle. We crept through bat caves n walked amongst sharks n talked with monkeys. It be amazin hows they can puts it all into buildings, sets the right temperature n adds the right critters n jus like that you be there! Why they even created our own li'l piece o home complete with possums, skunks n porcupines! Pa went out the vehicle to retrieve his hunting gun n fishing pole cuz he saw great opportunities for dinner, but he was stopped short o the gate by some bluecoat flatfoots n told it weren't proper to eat pets. Yep...that's what all them critters was...pets!

Friday, July 17, 2009

Mouse Pizza

Chuck E. Cheese be the uglier yet happier brother of Mickey Mouse. Chuck don't run a Magic Kingdom, but he does own quite a chain of pizzarias. So we stopped by to sample his sauce. Not bad for mouse pizza!

We found out that Chuck does more than make pepperoni pies. He runs a much smaller version of his brother's amusement park...more affordable to the patrons too. So we let the littlins loose on the establishment.

Poor Ki, got a little too rambunxious n took a time out in the mouse cage. We learned the cage had all sorts of tunnels n a runnin wheel just like the smaller version. Can't say it was real punishment...I mean, jus look at that grin. Not exactly sad, is she/ She dun learned her lesson n was let out to roam again. Made Ma wonder if they had big mouse traps laid around too.

Bubba found his niche throwin balls at the ol peach basket. Watch out Lebron! Clear the way Kobe! This be the new generation of bucket bombers....least ways that is what Bubba said till Pa Shaq came by n stuffed a few shots...

The boy then tried his, his foot at somethin else. Next thing you know he be shoutin down Pele, Kaka n Ronaldinho n yellin, "GOOOOOOOO OOAAAAAALLLL!!! Yep, Bubba dun bested the li'l goalie n netted one right after the other.

Our bellies full o pie n all our quarters spent, we thought it high time to scedaddle. Besides, Pa's ears was hurtin from all the screamin kiddos...not to mention his sore toes, the result of a herd o chilluns stampedin by to play a little skeeball. Thanks for the amusements Chuck! Maybe next year we'll call on Mickey!